Now You See Me

Last year I was at a point in my single life when I was uninterested in men who were uninterested in me. Fed up with dead-end “friendships” with emotionally unavailable and unresponsive men, I prayed the prayer I almost regretted. I asked God to protect me from men who didn’t have my best interest at heart. If he wasn’t the man I would marry, then you could count me out.

But what if that prayer is slightly off the mark? What about the men I could positively impact during my season of singleness? What about the men God would call me to serve alongside? What about the men who have never experienced the beauty of femininity, confidence, and grace from a woman who loves Jesus? What if asking God to hide me is selfish? What if there is a more powerful prayer?

Photo Credit: m_bartosch via FreeDigitalPhotos.net, royalty-free

Photo Credit: m_bartosch via FreeDigitalPhotos.net, royalty-free

When I met my boyfriend, he was more refreshing than an ice cold glass of water on a sweltering summer day in the south; more refreshing than a warm shower on a wintry night; more refreshing than a hearty meal after a season of fasting; more refreshing than… well, you get my point. I wasn’t paying any attention to him, but he saw me. Shortly after we met, I had a lunch engagement with my mentor. There she challenged me to ask God what this young man’s purpose was in my life and what purpose I should serve in his life. Every man you meet is not going to be your knight in shining armor. Every man is not your potential, and should not be treated as such. You may be who God uses to show him how Christian women conduct themselves. You may be who God uses to show him that all women are not seductive and manipulative. You may be who God uses to minister the gospel of Jesus through your testimony of purity and unwavering dedication to Christ. Our purpose in a man’s life could lead to a wedding ring, but our first order of business is to demonstrate the love of Christ.

Although I knew I was beginning to develop feelings for him, I kept everything in perspective by allowing Jesus to guard my heart, emotions, and intentions. All I asked was for Jesus to be glorified in however this relationship was to progress. Some time had passed since my last lunch date with my mentor. This time when she asked about my budding relationship, I told her I believed he was the one my heart had been waiting for. She asked me how I knew. I told her, “Because God allowed him to see me.”

I have always looked this way, written this way, and loved this way. Like an abstract sculpture that few people notice, people have walked past me with little appreciation, but only one man stopped to see me for the masterpiece that I am.

It was that moment when I realized the stunning beauty of those words. This man’s eyes had been opened and he had the vision to behold the beauty (and flaws) that make up who I am. He knows me because he wanted to know me. He listens to me because he wanted to listen to me. He understands me because he wanted to understand me. But he loves me because he sees me, and he sees me because God opened his eyes and placed me in his line of sight.

So, what if the more powerful prayer isn’t to be hidden but to be seen by the man who is sent from God? To be hidden can be lonely, but to be seen and known is the deepest desire in the heart of every woman. Asking to be visible makes us ready for God’s use. Let’s be unafraid to be seen by men. Let’s ask God for His purposes for the men in our lives. Let’s ask God to lead people in our lives we can impact, and who will positively impact ours. Let’s be willing vessels for His good during our singleness. Let us be fully seen by Jesus, and ask to be seen by the man who will vow to love us until the end of time.

Jesus Controls My Twitter

I love the Word of God. I love that it’s not solely a book full of stories about great people, historical wars and good advice. No, the Bible is the God-breathed, Spirit-inspired words of life and truth. As my pastor often says, it is so exhilarating to look into the Bible and to have the Word looking back at you. The Word of God is ALIVE!

Psalm 63 is my favorite psalm. It’s been that consistent passage of Scripture that stares back into the depths of my soul and spirit, and cries out my deepest prayer of intimacy with God. This morning that passage was burning inside of my spirit, beckoning me to draw closer to Him with eager desire. As I recited the words over and over, the whisper of the psalm leaving my lips caused my heart to swell. I was impacted by the power of that moment and all that His spirit was singing over me. In that moment, time stood still and the first thing I thought to do was tweet what He’s been sharing with me.

Social Media Kills Intimacy

“Every other religion calls their god ‘God’. Every other religion calls their god ‘mighty’. Every other religion calls their god ‘omniscient’, ‘omnipotent’. That is not what separates us. What separates us is NO other religion calls their god ‘Husband’.” Fighting for Love, Damon Thompson ♥

Our relationship with God is not just that of a Father and His child, but we have been given access to approach Almighty God like our Beloved Husband. We are betrothed (engaged) to Jesus Christ, the Son of God! As our closest Friend and Betrothed Lover, there are times when He wants to commune with us spirit-to-spirit in unabashed intimacy. There are moments when He wants to whisper sweet nothings directly to our spirits. There will be times when He wants to wrap His arms around us, comfort us, and dance with us to the song His angelic choir sweetly sings. There are precious secrets our Beloved wants to share with us about our future, our dreams, our purpose that He doesn’t want shared with the world. I believe there are some things Twitter and Facebook should never know about our relationship with Christ.

How would a spouse feel if every moment of emotional and physical intimacy was shared in detail on a social media website? I have witnessed married couples tweeting private details about their marriage bed activities and pillow talk conversations, and I’ve felt like an innocent intruder. I’ve often thought how disrespectful, immature and tasteless it appears to be, yet how often have I done this to my Fiance? I was having this conversation with my sister in Christ, Liz Franklin, and she told me that God had been ministering the same things to her. He specifically asked her, “Can’t you keep anything between us?” 

Filter My Twitter Feed

Why do we feel the need to share every single aspect of our lives on social media? Every single thought, deed, action, opinion, or attitude does not need to be shared on the Internet. I recently realized that it is easy to misuse Twitter, Facebook or Instagram. We may post “spiritual” or “Christian” things, but I began to ask myself why I was posting certain things. Am I really saying this for Jesus’ glory or am I puffing up my own vanity? As I began to ponder these things, I was disgusted by some of my own motives and tweets. Twitter has a way of making our own opinions higher than they should be. The Bible says that should destroy arguments and every lofty opinion raised against the knowledge of Christ (1 Corinthians 10:5). Does my Twitter or Facebook really bring glory to God, or does it bring glory to myself and my exploits? More importantly, am I sharing intimate details about my relationship — encounters and conversations — with Christ that should only be kept between the two of us?

Does God Hate My Twitter?

In every relationship, discretion is key. Even in this divine romance with Jesus, there are some things and precious moments that we should want to keep sacred. Of course, for anyone who is in love, it’s difficult not to share with the world every single detail about this new Love we’ve found. So, does this mean that we should delete all social media accounts and never share anything about our relationship with Christ? Heavens, no! I would suggest praying and asking God what He desires for you to share on social media sites. There have been plenty of times I’ve typed something into Twitter, only to backspace immediately when I feel a tug encouraging my silence. Use wisdom and discretion! Consult God and ask Him to revitalize your social media profile, and to show you what to publicize and what to keep hidden in His bosom. Transparency is a beautiful thing in the Kingdom of God, but sometimes Twitter or Facebook isn’t the best way to express that.

This simple prayer that can be found in 2 Corinthians 5:14 helps me immensely. The love of Christ controls me. In addition, the love of Christ controls my tweets.

Jesus, control my tweets!

Question: Is Twitter or Facebook sometimes a stumbling-block to our relationship with Christ? Comment and tell me what you think!

I’m Saved, So Why Am I Single?

Jesus sacrificed His life for all of humanity so that we might have the opportunity and the power to be reconciled with the Father and experience eternal life. He saved us from all of our sins. We no longer have to be bound by sin. Sin once held us as captives; sin was our master. Jesus snatched the power of sin and death from the enemy and breathed new life into us. Jesus is a HERO! He saved the day!

Jesus is a Gentleman. After He paid the price for the most amazing gift we could ever be offered, He does not bombard His way into every man’s heart. He doesn’t force Himself into lives where He isn’t welcome. He stands at the door and knocks. Isn’t He so sweet?

Behold, I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears My voice and opens the door, I will come in to him and dine with him, and he with Me. –Jesus via Revelation 3:20 NKJV

When Jesus comes into your life, He wants to wine and dine you. He wants to commune with you. He wants to be intimate with you. He wants your undivided attention. He wants to clean you up and make you into His image. After all, He died to spend every moment of your life (and beyond) with you. He was so desperate for you that He sacrificed His own life; He laid it down because the Father couldn’t bear the thought of spending eternity without you. Now that He has you He wants to romance you. He longs to sweep you off of your feet. He wants to make love to your heart. He wants to be your First Lover. He wants you for Himself. That is the point of salvation.

So, why is it that so many of us get saved and the first thing we expect from God is a relationship?

The church is widely known as a place in which one encounters the presence of God. Over time I have observed that many people attend church with one eye on God and the other eye wandering around the church looking for potential mates. (Some people, dare I say, don’t come to church for God at all) Singleness has become the most despised stage of life among people of all ages. There are external pressures attacking singles from every side, probing and questioning why they aren’t dating or married, when they plan to get married. This, in turn, indirectly discourages contentment in singleness.

We know the scriptures that say, “He who finds a wife finds a good thing,” (Proverbs 18:22) and, “Seek ye first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added to you (Matthew 6:33).” Sometimes we, as singles, use these scriptures as a God-given word that will get us away from the grips of singleness. The questions I want to pose to my fellow singles are:

  1. Why are we so eager to escape singleness?
  2. Rather than asking God why we are [still] single, why not ask Him why He wants us to be single?
  • The Power of Singleness

But I want you to be without care. He who is unmarried cares for the things of the Lord, how he may please the Lord. But he who is married cares about the things of the world, how he may please his wife…The unmarried woman cares about the things of the Lord, that she may be holy both in body and in spirit. But she who is married cares about the things of the world, how she may please her husband. And this I say for your own profit…and that you may serve the Lord without distraction.” –Paul via 1 Corinthians 7:32-35

Your life should neither start nor stop with a relationship. A relationship is a beautiful gift from God, but many of us fail when we begin to think that we are insufficient or inadequate unless we’re in a relationship or married. That is a lie! Some of us are eager to abandon singleness because marriage is viewed as the only label of success in a person’s life. (Note: There are more reasons why some singles are eager to be married such as sex, comfort, security. This is simply one of them.) If that were true, will you have fulfilled your life’s destiny when you marry your future spouse? No! Marriage should be a step toward the fulfillment of God’s plan for your life, but it should never be a stopping point. There is more that God has in store for your life. Before I move on, I want to tell you that YOU, right here in your season of singleness, are created in the image of God and you have a purpose in the Lord. He wants to birth ministries through you because He has people who need to be touched by Him through you. These are people who only you can reach! You are not insufficient! You are not inadequate! There is nothing wrong with you because you are single. God has not forgotten you; He is working on the inside of you and creating amazing wonders that will come forth from you. Be encouraged!

With that being said, choose to be content in your season of singleness. Why? Because the Lord has work for you to do. Your season of singleness is not intended for you to sit at home and twiddle your thumbs until your future spouse knocks on your front door. God has work for you to do! God loves everyone, but I believe He has given a special grace to single men and women. We are called to be pliable, willing, obedient children. He can do more with us because we do not have the distraction of marriage. Imagine that God has given you the gift of music and He has called you to sing. When people hear you sing, sick people will be healed, deaf people will hear, blind people will see, dead people will awaken. God then calls you to travel to the nations and minister this gift He has given you. As a single person with no children or a spouse, you are more apt to go as God has instructed. As a married person, you have to consider your spouse and their profession, whether s/he will travel with you or stay home, and whether the house will be taken care of while you’re gone. Can your home survive on one income while you’re away? What if there are children? Who will provide and care for the children while you’re traveling and doing what the Lord called you to do? What about their education? Their friends? Don’t forget about the cute little puppy the family just adopted….

See how messy that scenario became?

As a single person, you should glory in the fact that you are in a place where God can call on you and you are able to go to any lengths to please Him. You are consumed with how you can please Him. If God wants you to spend the night in church before His altar, you may do so without having a spouse to consider. God is your spouse. He deserves your total, undivided attention. We are His full-time on-call agents ready to report for duty at any time. That is exciting! I keep myself preoccupied with the things that bless Him and I am always thinking of new ways to please Him. This is what He wants from us as single people. He wants us to commit to Him before He trusts us enough to give us another person to commit ourselves to.

  • Why Does GOD Want Me to Be Single?

But now, thus says the Lord, who created you, O Jacob, And He who formed you, O Israel: “Fear not, for I have redeemed you; I have called you by your name; You are Mine.  When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; And through the rivers, they shall not overflow you. When you walk through the fire, you shall not be burned,
Nor shall the flame scorch you.Since you were precious in My sight, You have been honored, And I have loved you; Therefore I will give men for you, And people for your life. — Isaiah 43:1-2,4

From the beginning of time, when God created Adam, He had a desire to fellowship with mankind. He wanted a people who would love Him fiercely, although not as fiercely as He would love them, for His love is incomparable and unfailing. He wanted a people who would allow Him to be their God. God takes ownership of the people and things He loves. In this passage, God speaks possessively. “You are Mine.” This illustrates the ferocity of the love that God has for us, that He would go to any extent (and already has when He sent Jesus to the cross) to ensure that we remain His.

For you shall worship no other god, for the Lord, whose name is Jealous, is a jealous God. — Exodus 34:14

This is a familiar text to many, but hear the words from our God. He says that there shall be not one single god before Him, that we should worship no other god. Why? Because He is jealous. A god (or idol) is anything that dethrones God’s place in our life. What does this mean for singles? How is this significant? Since God is a jealous God He will not allow anything to come into your life that He knows will take His place in your heart. He has gone through such strenuous lengths to have our affection and He will never bless us with something that He knows will cause us to turn our backs toward Him. So, if God knows that a boyfriend/girlfriend or husband/wife will become an idol to you, He may prolong your season of singleness. God loves you and He wants to bless you with the desires of your heart, but not if that means He won’t be included anywhere in those plans. Pray that God’s plans for life will be the plans you want for your life.

Remember, you are His and He is particular about His children. He won’t allow anything into your life that you are unable to bear. He won’t allow anything into your life that you don’t have the grace to withstand. There is no good thing that He will withhold from those who walk uprightly (Psalm 84:11). He truly has your best interest at heart.

So, the next time you are tempted to ask, ‘Lord, why am I [still] single?’, ask Him, ‘Lord, what would you have me accomplish in my season of singleness?’

Delight yourself also in the Lord, and He shall give you the desires of your heart. Commit your way to the Lord, trust also in Him, and He shall bring it to pass. Psalm 37:4-5